"Death to Innocence, Birth of Mind" oil on 6'x2'canvas 2003. This came after "Conception of Hope" and I was getting settled at Brooks. People are funny, when you tell them your plans ESP if they are ambitious, they will tell you it's impossible. Luckily, I believe in optimism even at my darkest hour. After my cousin was killed in a car wreck, a week later my grandfather passed. My grandfather was a Renaissance Man, and so was my grandmother. These two believed in my dreams and gave me every creative tool I needed to succeed.They made me the woman I am. Growing up my whole life in Alabama I learned to see the truth but also soul. After my boss's wife passed that same year, I decided it was time to move to California. So I took a chance and got accepted to Brooks. As I planned my exciting move to Santa Barbara,Ca I remember some trying to call my bluff. I smiled, for nothing is impossible if you want it bad enough. I remember my friend bailing on moving me last minute,so my mom volunteered.My mom is cool like that, when it came to my dreams, she believed in me. So we did this crazy long road trip across country. We had a tiny budget for rent but we found this fairytale house in Montecito, Ca with a room at low rent. As we pulled up I fell in love with the orange,lemon, avocado trees, the white picket fence and even a well in front. As we checked the room, it had a separate attic room attached. I was excited, cause wherever I go so does my easel. As we chatted I told her I was a painter,she offered me her garage to paint in. The next day I awoke to a beautiful view of the mountains and a beach minutes away. This was heaven I thought. As my mom left back to Alabama, I realized I was in paradise alone and a very poor young girl. The world seemed almost fake to me. I was living in paradise while we were at war. That's heavy to take in at a young age. So I studied CG Jung Dreams and wrote down my dreams. I was in search for an understanding of reality. I gave up loved ones to be here and tears flooded my face. Here I was no longer innocent to the world but awakened in my mind. This was the beginning not the end. ~tbfree