"Blue Bird In My Heart" acrylic on black wood panel 2013. Homage to a poem by Charles Bukowski called "Blue Bird." I remember being tongue tied in love when I was waitressing,selling art, bartering art with rockstars. There I was tongue tied, yet the fire in me has no problem speaking her mind clearly. What I love about Bukowski or having friends for years is perspective on love. I believe that it should be reversed in the beginning. I wanna lay all my cards on the table just to smile and say: "Run Away,fast as you can!" It's a trigger in me, cause when you have people who stand by your side for 3/4's of your life you get more comfortable laying all those cards on the table. I am flawed,my art is flawed, so be it what it is, I am happy to be me~tbfree. I feel so free having just typed this. Lets be honest "Love is like A Mad Dog From Hell" but "What Matters Most Is How Well You Walk Through The Fire." Learning people over and over and somehow pissing people off with "it's ok give it back"mentality has let my mind be free. Freedom of your mind is crucial in surviving this vicious cycle. I just want love to be free and honest. Bukowski and loving the friends in my life has me seeing life clearly. It's always gonna be a ride but can we just get the politics out of the way so we have fun on it? I honestly don't believe in the fairytale bullshit of love. A pretty face isn't enough for me, I need to see your soul and know your heart bleeds. Bukowski's poem is what I think of most men with love, or its at least the story I'm given often when I watch them run away from love. Maybe I've seen it all too many times I need the reverse to wanna stick around. I guess I see love as a vision of optimism in this cruel world we live in. I smile for what I can give to the universe. Love can be ugly when you're the only one who left her mask at the bottom of the "Abyss." I get so tired of plucking away to reveal ones soul. What's wrong with exuding it? Fear kills all but I have no fear of today nor tomorrow. Optimism saves me cause any time I'm sad I got good friends to get me through the day. Thus "there's a blue bird in my heart that wants to get out" so I set him free.